T R A N S I T I O N S
On moving back home from my home of the last decade, celebrating change, and committing to lasting connections.
These last ten years have been a wild ride. From leaving and returning to sunny San Diego and my big familia, to self inquiry, falling back in love with yoga, life and myself… and teaching from the heart.
When I left home for college I was rebounding from some very deep experiences of pain and self loathing. I was unsure about UC Santa Cruz, and went because it was the most esteemed school I’d gotten into (though I really didn’t apply to many). I didn’t really believe in myself academically, intellectually, or as a person…but I went through the motions and tried to do what everyone else was doing. Year one was a painful unravelling of my outwardly constructed shell. Year two a peek into, then running fast from, something deeper. Year three, BOOM, the return to yoga asana. Year four I learned about service from a place of passion and heartfulness. A well rounded education if you ask me!
Thank goddess for the forest.
Thank goddess for climbing trees, exploring trails with magic surprises, and stargazing in meadows.
Thank goddess for the medicine of the ocean.
Thank goddess for philosophy, humanitarians who inspired me, hippies and witches who mystified me, and the soulfulness of the place I had landed.
Following graduation I took my first YTT, and that dug deep into parts of me I never dreamed existed. Human connection, love…real, firmly embracing love…and recognition of how much all of that scared the sh*t out of me.
Thank goddess for my teachers.
Thank goddess for Bhakti and ceremony and Divinitree circa 2013.
Thank goddess for the barista years and roaming with friends till the wee hours of the morning.
Thank goddess for my newfound meditation practice…and for leaving parties to meditate because it felt SO DARN GOOD to come home to myself.
Then there was grad school. Stepping into my intellectual P O W E R and holding on to the fire that lit me up. Advocating month after month to study what I was passionate about, and making lots of waves along the way.
Letting go of what was once love. Opening to new love…the kind that set my soul on fire. Bringing yoga to youth, teaching practices for peace in the therapy room, and working on a B A L L E R dissertation. Working through self doubt again and again…and again times a million.
Starting every day in meditation. Growing as a yoga teacher and tapping into my authentic voice. Growing as a therapist and tapping into my authentic voice. Realizing that I’m one person in all settings and not needing to separate the beauty of who I am and the healing I have to offer.
Getting married. Applying to internship. Remembering the deep medicine of F A M I L Y. Realizing it was time to let things go. Doing everything in my power to get back to my familia. Things falling into place. Being terrified that things worked out the way I wanted them too (LOL).
Thank goddess for F A M I L I A.
Thank goddess for C O M U N I D A D that was my familia in these years up north.
Thank goddess for my fierce willpower that held me true to my truths amidst the pressure to conform.
Thank goddess for remembrance that I can choose a different path for my life AT ANY TIME AT ALL. And that society does not determine what I do or where I go. I owe nothing to anyone, and social standards do N O T determine my fate.
Shake things up BBs! We’re in for a wild ride. Because the truth is, it hasn’t B E E N a wild ride…it always will be one. And my goddess, I don’t ever want that to change. I don’t ever want to lose my W O N D E R for this world, for this life, for the love I have discovered through the practice of sitting with M Y S E L F. And for the love that has allowed me to create in my relationships, my community and my family.
Thank goddess for yoga. In all of it’s forms.
Thank goddess for connectedness.
Thank goddess for the great honor of bringing people together through L O V E.
Thank goddess for this breath…and this breath.
"Tell me, what is it you plan to do
with your one wild and precious life?"
—Mary Oliver
I’ll see you on the mat for now.
Manifesting online video classes and chanting to share with you, my dear sangha.
Manifesting a return to (leisurely) surfing as I return home.
Manifesting time with my precious family, a fur baby or two, and creating a beautiful home with my husband.
Manifesting a retreat that captures what I love about my home to share with you.
Manifesting much much more to come that I am bursting at the seams to grow into. Though who really knows what the universe has in store! I cannot wait to find out how I will grow even more into love.
I hope we stay connected, dear friends.
Love,
Kristina